In the Eyes of Your Child

Ah.. you ask me. How do you engage so deeply with your child with so much to do? It will take fifteen minutes. Sit down and watch.

There are several things you can watch. Observe their choice of activity. Good , good. Or their choice of toy or item they are handling. Yes, yes. That will give you clues into the heart of your child. But most importantly, to begin with, watch their eyes. Watch what they are watching.

What do they look at? How do they look at it? What relationship is there between their eyes and the object in their hands? What is the connection between what they are watching and their social interaction? So many questions can be answered by fifteen minutes of observing your child's eyes.

If yours is an older child, maybe homework is before them. How do they watch the paper? The books?

Keeping an eye on your child's gaze will answer questions without you having to ask them.

Respond to their gaze. Support or comfort or extend what you see them doing. Let that gaze be your lead into engagement.

Much is made and great is the importance of positive regard, that moment when parent and child look lovingly at each other. But of equal importance is the moment when your child is going about their business independently. Some of the richest information for your parenting comes from gazing into your child's eyes without them looking back.

Love
Deborah